My Story

My Story

The Power in a Voice!

It’s those life lessons that help you conquer FEAR.

“Confidence starts with beauty.  Beauty begins from comfort within.” – Demi Lovato

I believe that love and acceptance starts from within.   My passion is helping young girls & women build confidence in themselves, so they can succeed in their relationships and careers.

 My own struggle has been one of being a single woman in a world that has not always been kind towards me.     I have had my own issues with self-esteem and confidence.   From being rejected by boys at times and being singled out for things I was accused of doing in the workplace, on days I never worked.    The most difficult was my life lesson while living at an RV park in 2009.    I thought that a simple lifestyle might be the right solution, after finding myself trying to recover from bankruptcy.

Melinda Gates once said, “A woman with a voice is by definition a strong woman.  But the search to find that voice can be remarkably difficult”.

I arrived home to discover that I had been evicted!  I was shocked, because I have never been evicted from anywhere in my life.   Always the sweet girl who was kind!   In trying to sort this out with the manager, I found myself getting nowhere.  I began to wish that I had a man that could speak to him and support me, but he wasn’t there.   I felt as if my life was starting to fall apart, and why didn’t I listen to my mother and stay where I was?  It was in this moment that I felt alone and lost, not really knowing anyone while trying to fit in.

While word got around, a few people began to approach me encouraging me to fight this.   He had been picking on single women for awhile and the one’s that fought in the past seem to never win their case.   Perhaps me being smarter, I would know to do things right and hopefully win.  Well this became a several month battle, even involving the police.   And over purchasing a dog license at City Hall, tipping off BC Assessment for not reporting who was living there after six months.    What I had discovered was legislature that would prove this.

This process helped me discover my voice, finding the ability to finally stand up for myself and for what I believed in.     I was tired of being picked on and targeted, and this was the extreme!    I realized that it was easy to walk away rather than do anything.   He was like a small dictator, with a very big mouth.   It was also the start of finding myself homeless, staying with a co-worker I barely new and ending up at an old friends house in their basement suite.     It was a time of reflection and deep thought, as I sorted out where I would live next and what to do with my trailer.   I eventually sold it taking a large loss and my circle of friends I had known, soon became a distant past.

This is what pushed me to finally become a Counsellor, having suffered so much and losing even more.    The fall I had also experienced that day, and the surgery following this ordeal giving me no chance of having a family again.   I was left with 6 years to recover, while fighting the chronic pain, withdrawing from everyone I new except for a very old friend who lived in Victoria and my family.    It was a time of healing my wounds, my fears, my self-esteem issues and trying to find peace.

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2 thoughts on “My Story

  1. Although I am a man I understand your pain. I have woked through so much and have so much more work to do. I am an alcoholic and I have done every chemical to change the way I feel. After years of work I found I was full of low self esteem and abandonment issues. These of course were covered with a huge EGO. My kids understand this but still suffer the same feelings I am sure. They are aware and work on their love of themselves.

    I have a God. He lives within and all around. Your story is a message that helps so many. Tim Solloway

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    1. Thank you Tim for your kind words. Yes, men suffer just as much when it comes to having low self-esteem and abandonment issues, it certainly isn’t gender specific. They too are who I want to reach out to and help work through their own issues. It was hard to fight this battle, knowing where the bully may have been as well in their own life, but it was a life lesson for me something I felt I needed to do for myself and for others who were experiencing the same kind of treatment. The EGO for sure is something that is a stumbling block for many of us, and when we realize that it is us that is standing in the way, I believe its at that point we can then begin to heal. After that experience I had, it forced me to have to look at my own issues, and where some of those came from, while trying to understand what it was about myself that kept me in patterns that needed to come to completion. Loving self is an onward journey. I watched your video and was moved with your own story, wonderful now that you are helping those in similar situations and are homeless for whatever the reason. Blessings to you on your continued path, I am happy you have a God that cares and helps you continue on.

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